19 May 2012

Excuses Are Always Bullshit



I am trying to be more positive...just not today I guess. Sorry.

I should be doing better keeping up this blog, it is supposed to help, maybe me maybe you...who knows. Not having enough Time is shite, Cos I know damn well there are times when I sit doing nothing,  Psychomania, Depression, PTSD, whatthehellever.

What's going through my head? What isn't? I'm playing a waiting game with all things military right now, so no Change with that. I am just trying to have the best possible Time I can with the Family. Extended and local, or whatever.  The only thing that remains missing is big sister, so nothing new there.
Funny, both things Hurt, but in different ways. I don't cry when I think about how long the military, I don't lose my breath, want to scream, and drop to my knees ask whatever God that'll answer to.

I love my Family can't think of much that is as important, and I die a little bit inside when I know my daughter is not only Hellbent on hurting me but on hurting her Family as well. I don't know what exactly it is that I have done, but I am pretty damn sure her grandparents, uncles, aunts, cousins, etc never did a damn thing.

I should erase all this and not  bother anyone, but if i don't get it out..
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